Joe Kavanagh's Music News

U2's Achtung Baby! came up trumps on a recent poll held by Spin magazine, which asked the publication's employees to name the 125 most influential albums of the past 25 years. Released in 1991, the iconic album was co-produced by Daniel Lanois and Brian Eno, and was described by Spin as: "Struggling to simultaneously embrace and blow up the world, they were never more inspirational." While there is no doubting the pretentiousness of that statement, I think I preferred Bono when he was attempting to blow up and embrace the world, as opposed to saving it. Like most polls, Spin's was essentially the starting point for an argument, but for what it's worth, here is the remainder of the top 10: 2. Prince - Sign O' The Times, 3. The Smiths - The Queen Is Dead, 4. Nirvana - Nevermind, 5. Radiohead - OK Computer, 6. Public Enemy - It Takes A Nation Of Millions To Hold Us Back, 7. Guns N' Roses - Appetite For Destruction, 8. PJ Harvey - Rid Of Me, 9. Pavement - Slanted and Enchanted, 10. Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral...

It wasn't all praise and glory for U2 in the media last week, or one of their number at least, as Paul Weller declared his undying dislike for the band's messianic singer, Bono, and lead singer of the Police, Sting. Speaking to Q magazine, Weller confessed: "I don't like them because their music is rubbish. I don't like how conceited they are and how seriously they take themselves." That's all very well but look at how much good their preaching has done their own bank accounts. I'm sure Bono and Sting have managed to keep a host of accountants in jobs as a result of all their conceitedness, so let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Anyway, I just look on the pair of them as buffoons really, and anyone that believes one word out of their mouths is, well, what's lower than a buffoon in the foolish stakes? I think nincompoop about covers it. The only people that take Bono and Sting seriously at this juncture are Bono and Sting...

Staying with mouthy Irish singers for a moment, former Westlife warbler Brian McFadden caused a stir in Australia last week when he swore at a contestant on Australia's Got Talent, while he was acting as a judge on the TV show. The incident occurred when McFadden became embroiled in an argument with comedian Anne Ferguson-Howe, who was reportedly as funny as a proctology exam, but producers admit that they cut the scene out of the show. Speaking to Aussie newspaper the Herald Sun, Ferguson-Howe admitted that the two of them exchanged words, but maintained that the situation escalated, saying: "Brian pulled his mic off, climbed on stage and very cleverly, without anyone hearing, said, 'Why don't you just f*** off back to England?' I'd whack him. I'm a thick-skinned woman of 50 who loves a laugh but if it had been a 20-year-old girl the size I am with low self-esteem, I think I would have gone home and shot myself. It was horrific. If I saw him (McFadden) again, I'd whack him. I'd spit on him. I'm spewing that they've edited it in their favor." To be honest, I can't understand why in the name of Anna Mae Bullock they would have Bryan McFadden judging a talent show anyway. That's like getting a blind guy to judge a mime contest...

Keith Richards has a reputation as one of the biggest hell raisers that the music world has ever seen, but the aging rocker claims that much of his spec has been built on myths and half-truths, as he is ultimately happier living the quiet life. The Strolling Bones guitarist recently told an interviewer: "And I can be [a hell raiser], when I have the time for it, but I'm also growing up. I pace myself. Even I couldn't be that kind of Keith Richards all the time. When I'm at home I do as I'm told. 'Yes darling, no darling', like any other guy. But I know there's a streak in me that, given the opportunity, will show you what Keith can do." As long as it doesn't involve climbing coconut trees because the last time that happened, he came out of it like Jack that went up the hill with young Jill...

While we are talking about rockers of yesteryear, Paul McCartney told Q magazine that with the benefit of hindsight, he is glad that the Beatles never reformed, because it means that their legacy has remained unblemished with the passage of time. The legendary bassist claimed that the band did however come close to reforming on several occasions, saying: "There was a bit of talk of The Beatles at certain points. What used to happen was three of us would fancy it and then maybe George or John or I wouldn't. In a way it was a blessing. We'd done it, why spoil it? Whether it's God given or not, those four people were a pretty good mix." Until Yoko added her tuppence to the mix...

Annie Lennox has adamantly denied that she has contracted the HIV virus, after wearing a t-shirt emblazoned with the words 'HIV Positive' while appearing on a US TV show last week. The former Eurythmics singer maintains that her decision was meant as an act of camaraderie and not an announcement regarding her own health, writing on her blog: "The t-shirt is a bold statement of solidarity with those of us who are HIV positive. It risks social chastisement, because it is accompanied by a load of fear and taboo. We want HIV to go away... but it's currently the biggest killer of women of reproductive age around the globe. As a woman and a mother I intend to keep sending out the message." She might want to brush up on her grammar the next time she decides to issue a denial. Also, given that the act didn't raise any money for the cause and really only served to boost her own profile, I'm not sure that it achieved anything. Kind of like Bono's RED brand now that I think about it...

Mel B is all set to extend her family, as she is anxious to have a son with husband Stephen Belafonte. The former Spice girl already has two daughters, Phoenix (11), and Angel (3) who were each conceived with different partners. If Mel gets rid of her current husband upon getting pregnant then her reputation as some kind of benign arachnid is all but assured. Haven't times changed when people now say things like: 'Yeah, I already have a few kids by other blokes but I just thought it might be a good idea to have one with my husband.' Man, I'm getting old...

Roger Ebert made public a script that he had written for the recently deceased Malcolm McClaren, when he posted it on his website last week. The portly film critic claimed that he was commissioned to write the script back in 1977, which was due to star the Sex Pistols, and be directed by legendary B-movie director, Russ Meyer. Ebert even says that they had begun work on the movie but called a halt to shooting after two days when the seminal punk band imploded during their US tour. A punk movie written by Roger Ebert, starring the Sex Pistols and directed by Russ Meyer? It sounds like something that Robert Downey Jr. would conceive after a weeklong bender... After weeks of rumors concerning their future, UK act Doves announced last week that they will take a two year-hiatus from music, as they are tired of the grind of touring and releasing albums. The band insists that they will be back, but then again so did Amelia Earhart, so I wouldn't place too much stock in that...

It appears that Liam Gallagher has managed to make an enemy of Adam Ant, if a recent interview with the latter is to be believed. The Prince Charming singer (real name: Stuart Goddard) apparently took umbrage with the mere mention of Gallagher's name during an interview with The Quietus. Upon being told by the interviewer that Gallagher is not a nice person, Ant erupted, announcing: "Marc Bolan was lovely. Bryan Ferry was lovely. Michael Jackson was lovely. Liza Minelli was lovely. I'm dropping these names because I f***ing met these people and they taught me something: Be nice. People that are really brilliant are really nice, people that ain't got a lot of mouth. So here you go Liam, you c***. I'd like to have a fight with him whichever way he wants: physically, mentally I'd beat him in anyway shape or form, I know that." I know who my money would be on in that scrap because to paraphrase James Brown, Liam Gallagher might know karate, but Adam Ant knows karazy. And I was just saying in last week's column how nice it is to hear Adam Ant sounding so well adjusted once again, after all of his years battling violent tendencies due to mental illness...

Idiot of the week prize - and already a strong contender for idiot of the year - goes to Dappy from UK group, N-Dubz, who was thrown out of Alton Towers theme park for smoking cannabis, only one day after he offered an impassioned public apology to his young fans, after he was caught using drugs on camera. Footage of Dappy (real name: Dino Contostavlos) using the recently banned substance Mephedrone surfaced online recently, forcing the diminutive singer to repent in the media, only to be snared a day later in another drug incident. I'm not saying the guy is an idiot for smoking a joint, but I am saying he's an idiot for doing so in a public place and getting caught less than 24 hours after saying: "I said recently that I hadn't touched serious drugs for years and maybe that wasn't completely true. But I now want people to realize how dangerous mephedrone and similar drugs can be - it can ruin lives. I'd want any of our fans to stay well clear. I've learned my lesson and I hope others will too." I'm sure his nose probably grew a few inches while he was saying that, but on the plus side, at least that'll be handy for when he progresses to cocaine. This is also the same dunderhead that was recently chosen to be a spokesperson for an anti-bullying campaign, only for him to send death threats via text, to a girl that called in to a BBC radio show to critique his band's music. Now I'm searching for the next rung down from nincompoop but I think it involves swearing so I'll let it go...

Speaking of poor choices as spokespeople, the UK's Prince's Trust has decided against supporting Kelly Osbourne's campaign to raise self-esteem among young women. The decision comes after photos of Osbourne in advertisements for a tanning company were digitally-altered, apparently with her permission. PinkStinks, an organization devoted to promoting positive role models for teenage girls, blasted Osbourne for the move, which led directly to her being dropped by the trust. Osbourne has since stated her bitter disappointment at the move, but - in keeping with how differently she deals with things when compared to normal people - I'm sure she just hired a group of midget acrobats to act out scenes from Scarface just to cheer her up. She can't even bury her sorrows by getting on with her wedding plans after the 25-year-old stated that she and 20-year-old boyfriend, Luke Worrall have no plans to tie the not in the near future. Speaking on Barbara Walters radio show last week, Osbourne announced: "I have no intentions of getting married anytime soon, and neither does he... I don't want to be married until I'm 30." Not to be cynical but I'd say there's as much chance of young Worrall still being around in five years, as there is of getting Doves to play at the reception and Amelia Earhart to do a flyover for some aerial shots of the ceremony...