Joe Kavanagh's Music News

Mel Gibson has evidently joined Ron Wood's school of marriage guidance, as he has allegedly become the latest celebrity to fall for the charms of a Russian youngster, having recently been snapped in a romantic embrace with someone other than his wife while on a beach in Costa Rica. Russian pop singer Oksana Pochepa claims that she is the "other woman" in the contentious photo and says that she is completely smitten with the aging Hollywood icon. Talking to the media last week the 24-year-old claimed: "Until Mel and his wife Robyn settle their relations, no one has the right to speak about this. It is unfair. It's not normal. As soon as the divorce happens, I will be able to comment. He is a superb man. I have no choice except to keep silent now." I am reminded of the immortal line from Mrs Merton when she was interviewing the considerably younger wife of aesthetically-challenged magician Paul Daniels and shamelessly enquired: "What was the first thing that attracted you to millionaire Paul Daniels?" Fearful of having to pay out a huge divorce settlement, Gibson's lawyers have now gagged Pochepa but they might have wanted to do that before she issued that statement because unless she starts giving interviews about the size of his wiener, then the damage is already done. Gibson has famously been a strong advocate of family values throughout the years, although his reputation has taken a bashing since his infamous drunken episode a few years back, and what remained of his high horse has now surely walked out the door along with his wife Robyn who has now apparently filed for divorce...

In addition to revealing the wealthiest people in music, The Times annual rich list has also shown the remarkable effect which the current financial crisis has had on the wealth of stars, with Elton John and Paul McCartney being the worst affected. John has lost a staggering 26% of his wealth in only one year, with his fortune dropping from $329 to $245 million; mind you, he could probably spend that on flowers in a month, given his notoriously lavish tastes. Macca has also felt the pinch with his wealth dropping from $784 to $700 million but I wouldn't imagine you'd even notice if you had that much cash. According to The Times the following are the top ten wealthiest British musicians: Clive Calder ($1.8 billion) 2. Lord Lloyd-Webber ($1.05 billion) 3. Sir Paul McCartney ($700 million) 4. Sir Cameron Mackintosh ($490 million) 5. Simon Fuller ($420 million) 6. Sir Mick Jagger ($266 million) 7. Sting ($252 million) 8= Sir Elton John ($245 million) 8= Keith Richards ($245 million) 10= Olivia and Dhani Harrison (George Harrison's widow and son) ($196 million) 10= Sir Tim Rice ($196 million)...

Paul McCartney was also in the news last week calling on the European Parliament to introduce a total ban on the sale of seal products, in an effort to stop the brutal act of seal clubbing (which is nothing like seals having a night out on the town). The former Beatle issued a statement saying: "The fate of millions of seal pups is in the hands of elected members of the European Parliament. In the next few weeks they will have a historic opportunity to stop the cruel trade in seal products throughout the European Union." In all fairness the fate of seal pups is at least as much in the club-wielding hands of an army of bloodthirsty Newfoundlanders too...

Snoop Dogg has been chosen to host this year's Mobo Awards, which will be held this coming July, marking a complete turn of events for the rapper who only recently had the ban which prevented him entering the UK lifted. This year's show will be held in Glasgow, the first time they have been held outside of London since 1996. I wouldn't imagine that Snoop will do too much shaping in Glasgow because the people there don't play games. He also would not want to mess around with the local airport security like he did in Heathrow, which led to his aforementioned ban. The airport security staff are so hard in Glasgow Airport that only two years ago one of them beat the living hell out of two would-be suicide-bombers with his bare hands, and one of the bombers was on fire...

Paul Weller was forced to cancel a New York gig and the remainder of his US tour last week after the sudden death of his father. John Weller was 77-years-old and had acted as his son's manager for over three decades, right from the beginning of his career when he arrived on the scene as a precocious youth with seminal act The Jam. Weller's understandably distraught and is taking time off to cope with his loss...

Noel Gallagher clams that there will be no new Oasis album for the next five years telling Q Magazine: "The last three albums have been three years in between, but I see it as likely to be longer this time. We've arrived at the point I wanted to be at from when Gem [Archer] and Andy [Bell] joined the band. And the last time we did that was at the end of Be Here Now, and we rushed the next album [Standing On the Shoulder of Giants]. There was no inspiration on it. By the time we make another record we'll be five years older. It [will] be really interesting for fans of the band to see how each individual makes up the whole." There are those out there who would say there has been no new Oasis album since their debut Definitely Maybe all the way back in 1994...

Bob Marley's anthem One Love has been chosen as the best song ever to come out of Jamaica, after a panel of scholars, musicians and dignitaries from across the West Indies was charged with listing the top 100 songs from the past 50 years from around the region. The remainder of the top five were as follows: 2. Oh Carolina by The Folkes Brothers 3. 54-45 by The Maytals 4. Got to Go Back Home by Bob Andy 5. My Boy Lollipop by Millie Small...

Ray Winstone has been tapped up to play the father of Ian Dury in an upcoming biopic chronicling singer's life titled: Sex & Drugs & Rock & Roll. The role of Dury has been given to Andy Serkis and shooting is expected to take place during the summer...

Swedish act The Knife are currently working on a stage opera which will be based on Darwin's Theory of Evolution. The work titled: Tomorrow in a Year will features three singers from three different disciplines: electronica-pop, classical opera and performance. The band issued a statement claiming: "They are structure, sensation, form, time and thought. They are the spokesman, the organiser, and the one who acts." I would give the thing a chance simply because The Knife are involved but this could turn out to be one of the most pretentious pieces of claptrap ever to be foisted upon music fans, if they are not careful. The opera will open in November to coincide with the 150 anniversary of the publishing of Darwin's seminal work The Origin of Species...

Staying in Sweden for a while, figuratively at least, Lauryn Hill will make another effort at a comeback when she appears at the Stockholm Jazz Festival this coming July. The event will mark her first European appearance since an ill-fated UK tour in 2007, which turned into a complete joke due in large part to Hill's bizarre behavior. Hopefully things will turn out better this time around because she is a truly great talent when she is on song...

Japanese singer Tsuyoshi Kusangi has issued a public apology after he was recently discovered drunk and naked in Tokyo. The penitent pop star clamed: "I drank a lot and did not know what I was doing. I deeply apologise to fans for causing so much trouble and worry." Kusangi was a huge star in Japan during the 1980s with boyband SMAP and his drunken antics have cost him a lucrative contract with Toyota. The ironic thing is that such boorish behavior by stars in our culture is not only rewarded but utterly celebrated. Mind you if I had to apologise for every time I got myself into trouble after a few tipples then I wouldn't have much time for anything else, so I'm going to climb off my high horse, which is somewhat different to Mel Gibson's case because that dude was thrown off his.