Joe Kavanagh's Music News

Despite being one of the great enigmas of music during his all too brief life, John Lennon will now have his deepest secrets revealed for public consumption by author, Philip Norman, who will soon release 'John Lennon: The Life'. Among the salacious revelations contained within is an allegation that Lennon entertained the idea of pursuing a homosexual relationship with fellow Beatle, Paul McCartney, in addition to harboring sexual thoughts about his own mother. The latter contention stems from a recording of a conversation Lennon had on September 5, 1979, when a voice purported to be his claims: "I was just remembering the time I had my hand on my mother's t*t in one Blomfield Road. It was when I was about 14. I took a day off school, I was always doing that and hanging out in her house. We were lying on the bed and I was thinking 'I wonder if I should do anything else?' It was a strange moment, because I actually had the hots for some rather lower-class female who lived on the other side of the road. I always think that I should have done it. Presuming she would have allowed it." Yoko Ono and McCartney - who both contributed to the book in its early stages - are said to be absolutely livid at the claims. Freudian stuff indeed but like most reasonable people, I find it distasteful to tear someone's personal life apart for profit, especially when they have no way of defending themselves...

While we're on the subject of Macca, the former Beatle has made himself a target for Islamic fundamentalists, as a result of his decision to play in Israel on September 29, as part of the country's 60th Anniversary Celebration. Speaking to UK newspaper, The Daily Express, extremist cleric, Omar Bakri, claimed: "Our enemy's friend is our enemy. Thus Paul McCartney is the enemy of every Muslim. We have what we call 'sacrifice' operatives who will not stand by while he joins in a celebration of their oppression. If he values his life Mr. McCartney must not come to Israel. He will not be safe there. The sacrifice operatives will be waiting for him." Once known as the "Tottenham Ayatollah", Bakri was banned from the UK in 2006 after living there for over two decades, because of his extreme views. Despite his avowed hatred for all things Western, Bakri actually tried unsuccessfully to sneak onboard a Royal Navy boat, as Britain attempted to evacuate its citizens from the region, when war broke out between Lebanon and Israel two years ago. He also once told documentary filmmaker, John Ronson: "Oh Jon, I need you more than ever now. You know I am harmless, don't you? You know I am just a clown. You know I am laughable, don't you? ... Why don't people believe you when you tell them that I am just a harmless clown?" Amazingly, some mentally deficient people actually hang on this guy's every word, but McCartney claims that the gig will go ahead, despite the threats from confused nut-jobs. Israel banned the Beatles in 1965 because they feared the effect that they would have on children and young adults, which is pretty amazing considering kids there have to deal with bombs and bullets on a regular basis. Almost as unbelievable is the fact that the ban was only lifted this year! ...

Despite Lily Allen's claims that she and Elton John remain friends, after their much publicized spat while presenting the GQ Awards a couple of weeks back, it now appears that there may be a schism between the pair after all. Speaking to Metro, John claimed: "I was thinking about asking her to tour with me and maybe even do a duet. Obviously that won't be happening." I'm not sure what's going on with Lily Allen, but her recent diva-like behavior is making her about as popular as varicose veins...

Speaking of unpopular people, Madonna once again came under severe criticism from her own fans, who were disgusted at the poor sound quality at her London shows in Wembley last week. Fans were also riled by the Material Girl's late, late arrival, which meant that many attendees had serious trouble getting home on public transport after the show. Spokespeople for Madonna were unapologetic, saying that the sound was fine and denying that Madge was late, saying: "Stage times are only guidelines." Sorry, I was under the misconception that the very essence of the word 'guideline' means something that is to be followed. Talk about patronizing. You can also add the name of award-winning singer, James Morrison, to the list of those people who aren't Madge fans, after Morrison was recently introduced to her in an LA recording studio. Madonna had come to speak to the producer that was working with Morrison, and the latter was asked if he would like an introduction. Morrison claims: "I'm not her biggest fan but thought I'd say hello so I went over and said: 'Hello, I'm James, nice to meet you,' and put my hand out to shake hands. She just looked at it and said: 'And what do you do?' I told her I was a singer and she just stared at me and didn't say anything. It was really uncomfortable. Then she just ignored me. F*** her, though, it's just a matter of common courtesy. It doesn't matter what someone does for a living. She's just rude. There's no excuse for it."...

Kylie will reputedly be paid in excess $3,500,000 for a 60 minute show in the oil-rich Arab city of Dubai, as part of an event being held to open the private artificial island of Palm Jumeirah, which is built in the shape of a palm tree. Minogue also revealed last week that she is considering "going gay" because her luck has been so bad with men in recent times. I'm really confused now because here was I thinking that people are actually born gay but according to Kylie, it's actually a lifestyle choice...

Finally, Noel Gallagher is recovering after being pushed from the stage, after he was attacked by a crazed fan, during an Oasis gig in Toronto last week. Daniel Sullivan, 41-years-old, has been charged with assault after he ran across stage and pushed Gallagher down into the crowd, for no apparent reason. The incident was captured on video and has since become a big hit on Youtube. Gallagher suffered severely bruised ribs but managed to finish the show in true rock fashion, however, the band was forced to cancel two gigs because the guitarist is in so much pain. Gallagher also did a leap of another kind last week when he jumped to the defense of comedian, Russell Brand, who has come under a withering attack in the wake of him hosting last week's MTV Video Awards. Writing in his blog, Gallagher asserted: "Some woman called in saying as an American she didn't like a British guy coming over here, insulting her commander-in-chief! Very funny. But NOT funny at all. If Chris Rock, for example, says that kind of thing everybody laughs because they think they should, but if it's a man who's dressed up like a vampire's lamp-shade? Well? He was wasted on the shower of God-fearing, corporate hot-dogs anyway." Brand caused an uproar by saying: "Some people, I think they're called racists, say America is not ready for a black president. But I know America to be a forward thinking country because otherwise why would you have let that retard and cowboy fella be president for eight years? We were very impressed. We thought it was nice of you to let him have a go, because, in England, he wouldn't be trusted with a pair of scissors." Honestly, I don't see what's so bad about it because he's only saying what the entire world and most Americans are already thinking.