Joe Kavanagh's Music News

For better or worse, Saturday's Eurovision Song Contest was the big news story in European music last week, with the competition now threatening to come apart at the seams due to the jingoistic undercurrent that has characterized the event in recent years. Russian singer, Dima Bilan, led his country to their first ever victory in the contest, with his track Believe - well, I say his track but US producer Timbaland did all of the heavy lifting on it, truth be told. The Ukraine took second place and Greece third, while the UK managed to come in last, which seemed to be a little unkind on their entrant, Andy Abraham. As an Irish person, there is a part of me that is genetically predisposed to feeling good when England comes last in anything, but I have to admit that the highly-talented former garbage-man, Abraham, deserved better and was hampered by voting that appeared to be governed more by geography than quality of music. Even Irish TV presenter, Terry Wogan, whose annual commentary has become an institution in its own right, claims that he will now reassess his position in light of the slightly perturbing nationalistic air permeating the event and even wondered whether some countries should even bother entering, saying: "Indeed, western European participants have to decide whether they want to take part from here on in because their prospects are poor." Italy and Austria both refused to enter this year's contest, with their spokespeople claiming that the event is now simply a "political parade ground", a contention born out entirely by this year's voting patterns. Incidentally, despite generating global controversy Ireland's fowl entry, Irlande Douze Pointe, by hand puppet, Dustin the Turkey, didn't even make it past the qualifying rounds, which were held earlier in the week. Now that is entirely enough talk about an awful, awful show that foisted upon us such nefarious names as Celine 'Why the long face?" Dion and Lulu (although I think she's more than 50% plastic now so maybe she's not even technically the same person). And they were the talented ones! ...

Representatives of Oasis have been making noises in the media last week, intimating that Coldplay are ripping off an Oasis idea by releasing their upcoming album, Viva La Vida, in the UK on a Thursday as opposed to the more traditional Friday or Monday release date. Oasis believe that the move is designed to break their record for best three-day opening for an album, for their 1997 release, Be Here Now, which sold 700,000 copies in its first three days. Even if this is true, is it kind of scares me that anyone in their camp would even give this a second's thought, not to mind making a public fuss. I certainly wouldn't be drawing attention to Be Here Now, if I was in Oasis and given their own propensity for being a little, eh, familiar with the work of acts like the Beatles, I certainly wouldn't be accusing anyone else of imitation. Talk about fighting over which end of the egg to crack...

I read an interview with Phil Collins the other day (what can I say I was VERY bored) where he claimed that he is working on his latest solo album, only a month after telling the world that he was officially retired. I thought that he meant Sean Connery retired, not Jay Z retired. To be honest, I'd take Lou Pearlman retired if it was on the table. The only glimpse of hope was the fact that he claimed that he and his son are currently working on building one of the world's largest toy train sets. The former Genesis singer says that he has become so engrossed in the hobby that he will not return to working on the album until he has completed the train set. I wonder does he know that Rod Stewart has one of the largest indoor train sets in the entire world, built in one of his mansions and stretching an incredible 124ft by 23ft? Collins just strikes me as the type of petty character that would have to outdo Rod Stewart if he knew he had a bigger set. It's called compensating but I can never work out it's for the baldness or something else... Or both...

Speaking of Rod Stewart, the singer is said to be livid because his label, J Records, have allegedly refused him permission to make a country album as his next release. Stewart is quoted in the media as saying: "Everybody there (at J Records) is against that, which makes me want to do it even more. Apparently, the idea didn't test well, whatever the f**k that means. I want to do records for my own peace of mind. So when I do kick the bucket, I can say, 'I did that.'" It would be a little difficult to say 'I did that' when you are actually dead but I'm splitting hairs. This is the same man who claimed only months ago that it was his overwhelming desire to make an R&B album next and who is he kidding anyway? Rod Stewart sells tens of millions of albums yet he portrays himself as a minnow with no clout in the industry? Give me a break. If Rod Stewart truly wanted to make an album entirely featuring him on the paper and comb, all he would have to do is use some of his own money, rent a studio (he probably has one in one of his dozen mansions) and then put the record out with his own money - of which he has quite a bit. It's as simple as that. Sorry Rod, but I'm not buying your presentation of yourself as a Woody Guthrie-like, musical outlaw fighting against "the Man" for your beliefs. You are "the Man". Please stop making new music because it only adds further coats of tarnish to your fast-fading legacy...

While you're at it, enough with the glibness too... In contrast to the many hats worn by Rod, there is the sometimes brooding and occasionally dangerous figure of Paul Weller, who has stuck steadfastly to his convictions irrespective of trends or checkbooks. The so-called 'Modfather' explained to the BBC last week why he refused to accept a C.B.E. from the Queen, and in the process essentially removed any chance that he will ever be offered one again! The former Jam front man claimed: "I'm not really into it. It's not my sort of thing. It would have been a bit hypocritical for me to accept that, I don't really agree with it. I don't like the royal family, I don't like the establishment, I don't like the civil service." Weller was promoting his latest album 22 Dreams, which you can be sure is not the R&B album he always wanted to make and you can also be certain that was made without soliciting the opinion of the executives at his label. Music born of passion you might say, as opposed to music by numbers...

Finally, in one of the more curious stories of the week, fans of US band, My Chemical Romance, will stage a march in London later this week, aimed at protesting what supporters see as the overwhelmingly negative coverage the band receives in the British media, particularly since the suicide of a 13-year-old fan, Hannah Bond, several weeks ago. Elements of the UK media have openly speculated that the band's dark lyrics and tortured soul image contributed directly to the teenager's death, with the notoriously right-wing Daily Mail, referring to the band as a "suicide-cult". Outraged by the attack on their heroes, fans claim that the sense of kinship that they feel with the band gives them a sense of belonging and often prevents them from harming themselves. Over 1,000 people are expected to march from Hyde Park to the offices of the Daily Mail. While I am a supporter of social action on any level and can only got praise for action that disrupt a newspaper that was once a vocal admirer of Hitler; I can't help but feel there are other causes out there in this troubled world that are much more worthy of such energy when compared with sticking up for a bunch of millionaire musicians from New Jersey. I say we work on stopping Phil Collins first and that one act will precipitate the universe sorting itself out... Now who's the one being glib...